Last night: 20 minutes. So bad. Swirling thoughts. No focus whatsoever. I realized that my body was just exhausted from work, financial worries, restrictive diet and family duties. I needed sleep. I needed food. There was nothing I could do to fix my meditation when my body was tired.
So I let go of my expectations. I sat there just being aware of my racing thoughts, tiredness, sleepiness. I accepted it. I gave myself credit for meditating so late at night. I appreciated the fact that I was able to sit there not judging myself. Not quite an achievement, you may say? Try to go on for five minutes without judging or discriminating… Exactly!
I really do try to incorporate self-compassion and appreciation into my practice. So important. Without them I would have criticized myself for last night. But it wasn’t the case. There is a wisdom in kindness. Kindness is wisdom. That’s it.
Bad At Being Still 