27 May. My inner child.

I tried to sit longer on Saturday. But my kids woke up and I had to stop just after 5 minutes. I managed to sit for an hour on Sunday. I have injured my left knee at the gym last week so I sat in the chair. 40 minutes of mindfulness of the breath and body. Then I paused the timer and did 2 minutes of walking meditation. Then I finished off with 20 minutes of shikantaza.

I didn’t care much about racing thoughts. As long as I was able to realise that my attention was not on the breath, as long as I was able to bring it back and experience the present moment for 5, 10, 15 seconds I was happy. I know for a fact, I know from my own experience, that meditation is very helpful in creating skilful habits that allow me to go through my days without being awfully bothered by my ego, stress, anxiety, fear and… idiots. That includes the idiot in me…

…The thoughts I have while I meditate! Embarrassing. Pathetic. Egomaniacal. Childish. Fatuous. Capricious. Really dumb. Meditation certainly helps me to connect with my inner child.

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